Vicious Legal bully Apple sues Samsung yet again, further exposing the ridiculous nature of the patent system and the completely hopeless US legal system.

Side note: My favourite IT Support Company.

This time Apple wants to prevent Samsung from showing the world just how disappointing the iPhone 4s was by halting the sale of the vastly superior Galaxy Nexus.

Given the seeming ability of Apple to stop anything by waving its arms, I’m surprised The Outfit hasn’t yet managed to patent the action of wiping one’s bottom with toilet paper and charging the rest of us for the privilege. After all, it’s no more idiotic than the ability to detect a phone number in free-form text and make it clickable.

Yet that’s exactly what the moronic dimwits down at the US Patent Office let Apple get away with

Christ on a bike! What next? Will Apple successfully patent the action of breathing in air and expelling carbon dioxide? How about farting? Or better still, the process of engaging in spurious legal action against one’s competitors?

Whoops, I’ve just received a cease and desist order from Apple. Apparently Steve Jobs secured the patent on ranting back in 1998.

Meanwhile…in a boardroom somewhere in Cupertino a reptilian lizard overlord sits down to a meeting. “Well boys” he rasps, “who do you want to sue today?”

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